“Masturbation:- the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it’s a cure.”
As I sit here and start to write this blog, my mind is telling me to stop now, that i’m touching ground that shouldn’t be walked, but that alone is the reason for my blog.
We all know that masturbation is a part of everyone lives, and for a man it is the norm, openly talked about and no one really gives a damn, that they do it, more than likely daily.
When it comes to women, it is hushed up and not really talked about, not even now really. Not many women will admit they do or have, they will blush and change the subject pretty damn quick.
I for one will openly admit I do masturbate,(yes mum if you are reading this, your reading that right, I have and I’m sure will continue to for many of years to come) as I know every women who reads this blog, would have done in the past. But will she admit it?
Sexual openness has changed in the last few years, we women are all a little more open about our fantasies, what we find pleasurable and yes we even like to take control, to lead in the bedroom. So why are we all so shy when it comes to admitting that yes we play for pleasure?
My thinking is, it comes down to a life time full of our mother and father telling us how wrong it is, that only bad girls touch down stairs.
From the earliest of age, we are told, to never touch, not just girls but boys too. So many times I heard my brother Alex being told, his bits would fall off if he kept putting his hands down his pants. If I remember rightly, he was scared to death, that, that may really happen.
I’m shocked that he hasn’t been scared for life to be honest, he was given the belt a few times because he was caught with his hands on an erection. Did they not see the damage they could have done to him.
Alex, now has a son, who always has his hand inside his nappie, Alex doesn’t say a word and just leaves him be, it shows that some mantle influence has taken place in his mind. The damage was done, Alex now is trying not to give the same to his son. Ok I guess there is a time and a place for it eg you don’t really want your child to sit there tugging away in front of a room full of people, but where do you draw that line, with out scaring the poor child to death.
Personally I have no problem with someone, boy or girl learning their own body, to me it helps you discover what feels good to you and will help your sex life later on in life.
There are so many benefits to masturbation, to name a few.
Strengthens sexual relationship with partner.
Improves our mood.
It teaches us the difference between love and sex.
A beauty treatment, we glow after orgasm.
It also has health benefits, you get to know you body, so if the worst should happen you can pick up the changes sooner than later, so yes girls, a good old play could save your life.
All this being said, I can’t really remember the first time I touched myself.
I do remember once as a child, I sat in my room alone and wondered what went on done there, I remember touching it and even getting a mirror and having a look, I can truthfully say this wasnt sexual.
Even as a teenager I don’t remember playing, learning my own body, turning myself on. Maybe it was drilled into me so much I just didn’t think to try it.
I’m now going to sadly admit that I think I must have been in my late 20’s before I started to masturbate, hard to believe but this really is the case.
I can say even to this day it is something I dont that often unless a phone was involved and my partner at the time. To me sex with the person you love kinda makes everything else crap. Nothing compares to that feeling, it can’t be beat.
This may sum it up better.
“The difference between a self-induced orgasm and an orgasm given by a man is like comparing a rainy day and a rain storm. Rain was a sure thing, you knew exactly what you were going to get: a clean and crisp, both sweet and refreshing experience. But rainstorms were unpredictable, they were riddled with surprises, messy and wet; they were something you had no control over.”
― Madeline Sheehan
And when it comes to orgasms, all I can say girls, is don’t be scared of it, go with it, trust me, letting go is incredible, yes you will lose control, but that’s not a bad thing.
The feeling is so intense it will scare you to death, as to what will happen next, truthfully though, don’t stop yourself, go with it, not just for your own sake but for your partners to, your make his or her day.
As I’m on a personal mission to shame myself, I will open up here and tell you that my very first orgasm, real orgasm (as in, squirting, yes this can be done) was only a few years ago. Shocking as I’m 30 years old.
I have to admit that I was alone when it happened, well me and my trusty friend, “The Magic Wand” yes its a sex toy and if you don’t own one, then get on-line and order one. It’s a must in your toy box.
The wand, is so powerful as mains powered that within minutes of my first play an explosion went off and I came really came for the first time.
In turn helping me to let go and hopefully improving sex not just for me but for Ross, while we were together.
I will hold my hands up here and admit that no toy, no masturbation, will ever come close to how making love, to the man of your dreams makes you feel.
And I’m happy to say that a life time full of no sex what so ever from this day out, will be a blessing, because nothing can ever match that feeling of making love.
So anyway what I’m trying to say is, that times have changed girls, it not wrong to play, you’re not dirty, you’re not bad, play away and enjoy, even admit it, for there is nothing wrong with teaching yourself self-love.