You can’t change other people, it’s their choice to either change or to not to. But I have always lived by the case of putting others first, before myself, in a round about way, living my life for others.
My dad said, my heart is worn to love and help if I can. He tells me even though this is a blessing, it’s also my down full.
I think he may be right.
I’ve been asking myself an question, “How do I truly live for the sake of others?”
‘honestly, most times when I’m helping someone out, I’m subconsciously thinking that they will think good of me and treat me well. Give me respect. Give me love.
But in the end it doesn’t work. You convince yourself that you’re living for the sake of others, but in the end its just for yourself, and when you don’t get that good treatment, that respect, that love, you get disheartened.
If you’re really Living for others, you are doing it solely for the purpose of the other to feel joy and to better their well being. You aren’t wanting anything in return.
Can any of us say, deep down we can do this?
So why do we want something in return? It’s not as though we didn’t actually want to help that person. We did.
But after the first initial thought, you wanted something more. You could say that my mind wanted to give, but my body wanted to receive.
Now, when I first realized that this was how I thought, my first reaction was shame.
It’s like when you do something horrible which you regret and you can’t think of anything else to do but beat yourself up about it.
But then, I remembered something.
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less
I think it’s safe to say that, just as it is bad to be egoistic, it’s just as harmful to be self neglecting, or self loathing, and doing either isn’t helping anyone else around you.
There is a disunity within everyone, whether you call it Good Vs. Evil, Fallen Nature, or a Tension of opposites. It’s there, and its destroying the lives of individuals every single day.
So how do you become totally selfless?