Wearing my heart……

imageTears over flow and get to a point they turn to anger.
My inner voice screams at you “get out of my head, please get out of my head” why are you in there when you have made it god damn clear that you don’t give a damn about me.

As soon as I have thought those thoughts , anger then turns to tears very quickly and I then get so angry at myself for thinking such thoughts.
I hate myself intensely and I am disappointed at myself and discussed with my thoughts, its no wonder you don’t love me. Why would you? I’m just a plain Jane and all I have to give is my love, which you already own.

How can I get angry with you when I love you so much, so so much.
But baby it doesn’t stay with me for long because I know you’re the most amazing person I have ever met and my love for you only grows.
I know that falling in love with my best friend could be a blessing and a curse. On one hand, you know me better than anyone does in this world. We’ve been through it all together, (the good, the bad, the ugly), and you’ve always stood by my side. I have more fun sitting around with you and doing nothing productive, than I do with anyone else. You’re my right wing man and I love you. Your my best friend.
It hurts so much not to have you by my side and I want you there, I want you there so badly.
I don’t want life without you. Your all I want.
Your the only person that makes me happy. Your the missing piece of me and I’m lost so lost without you.
You truly have shown me that there are decent people in the world.
You are funny, kind, and you listen to me when no-one else would.
And when you use to tell me that I am beautiful, it mad my soul jump alive with a life it has never lived before. I don’t think you know how much all those comments meant to me, but that’s just you.
Your words and the meaning behind them touched me deep within my soul and for the first time in my life I knew words could have a meaning, a meaning that was linked to the heart.
For the first time ever I felt loved, loved differently to any other. It was something so beautiful and words can not begin to explain what I mean, but I know that once you meant every word you said to me and when you told me you loved me, the look in your eyes gave it away before you even began to speak.
I will never forget those moments when words where not needed.
When we would just hold each other and look at each other. Those moments no words where needed and if you would only look at me you would see that through the tears, the weak moments of anger that no words need to be spoken because my eyes, my soul and my heart, would show you.
Like they did all those times when we were lost in each other.
Never has anyone captured my heart, my passion the way you have. Never have I felt so close to another human being on so many levels as I do with you.
Never have I been as content, at ease as when I was with you.
I just know we belong together, and you felt it to baby, you felt it to.
I love you, I love you so much. I just wish I could show you.


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