That ache

That ache in the pit of your stomach and heart when you feel totally helpless in stopping you gorgeous daughter from hurting.

This overwhelming feeling of helplessness just keeps eating away at you. Causing so many different emotions from anger, hate, desperation, the list could go on and on.

I don’t often write about my daughter as I will do anything to protect her but as I have posted about her being bullied at school, I feel I have to write this post just to get these uneasy feelings out and I don’t like posting negative feeling on her blog page. I want her memories to be happy ones and I want her to feel joy when we write her posts together.

Sadly all joy from her half term vanished as soon as she put her shoes on to leave for school this morning.
For all of you that know my little ray of sunshine, know that she always wears a smile on her beautiful face, her passion for life is a lesson to all the meet her. Her strength and determination is an inspiration. The pride she glows with when she achieves the tiny things in life is totally wonderful to watch. I know I’m her mum but she really is the finest diamond and you can’t help but love her.
She really is my silver lining.

So when she has uncontrollable tears streaming down her face at the thought of going to school, what do you do.

I so want to wrap her up in my arms and just keep her safe but I know I can not do that, she has to go to school, not just that, for she loves learning, she is truly passionate about it.

I so wish that I could somehow take control and knock those nasty bullies into next week because they deserve it for hurting her.
I try so hard to hold on to the compassion I tell myself over and over again, they must have a hard life to be so nasty at such a young age. I try so hard to make excuses for them but what if I’m wrong, what if they just are nasty children.
But it’s so hard to believe that someone so young can have so much negative energy in them.
I’m at a total loss of how to handle this because all I want to do is bang their heads together and teach them the effect they are having on my daughter’s life.
But all I’m left with is an over powering feeling of helplessness and guilt because I don’t have the power to protect her.

The things

imageThe things no one else is doing.
The things that frighten you.
The things others can’t do for you.
The things that make you question how much longer you can hold on and push forward.
The things that define you.

Those are the things that make the difference between existing and living… between knowing the path and walking the path… between a life of defeat and a life filled with happiness and success.
Adversity is an inevitability, and it’s much like walking in to a turbulent windstorm. As you fight to push through it, you not only gain strength, but it tears away from you all but the essential parts of you that cannot be torn.
Once you come out of the storm you see yourself as you really are in raw form, still holding the passions and values that move you, and little else.
These are the lusts that matter.. the inner love and vows that define you.
It is this kind of love that drives you forward and even when the going gets tough. It is this kind of love that strengthens the mind, body and soul.