Change

2017 another year that is flying by, another year that really doesn’t hold much meaning, it’s just a year of doing the same old, same old but still it’s a year of all our life’s.
It’s already seen to many deaths, too many low moments and not enough high ones.

2017 was the year of possibilities, hopes and goals, it’s the year that I’m trying so hard to stay on top of, the year I try my hardest to recover from the heartbreak that eats slowly but surely away at my soul. It’s the year that I’m determined to heal and it’s the year I decided to make a blanket that records the daily temperature for the year.

Every day, I log the highest temperature and I match that temp to a colour that represents that temperature on my colour chart.
Why I picked this year to do so, I do not know. It’s my cousins 18th year so maybe I will gift it to him.
I’ve already made two of these blankets, one for the two special years in my life, one each for the two most precious little People that have brought me the most love, hope, joy, sadness, fear and heartbreak, each year is their birth year, a row of colour each day of the year. They are very special in their own right and they mean a great deal to me, hopefully Marly will love hers and hold it as dear to her heart as I do.
I guess when I started this years temperature blanket  on the first of January, I had the best intentions for the year.I really wanted this year to be the year that I pull my socks up and start to recover from the pain, the devastation and heartbreak I have lived with for far to long. It’s the year that I hoped I would begin to heal, to find myself again.
It dawned on me though, that I can not and will not ever be the person I was back then, too much pain, torture and heartache has changed me, in ways it’s made me stronger. I no longer self harm, I can no longer cry, even when I need to (that truly sucks royal eggs at times)

I can no longer feel loved as I did back then, and even though I’m loved by my family and friends, it’s not the same as the love that he gave me, that I felt from him, the love that shone so brightly from his soul. I no longer can love the way I loved/love him, because nothing can compare to the love we had for each other, the love that still runs through my veins, my heart and my soul.
So maybe this blanket holds a new meaning, one of understanding, one of clarification, one of love.
Maybe the meaning may change again over the year but right now I’m glad I have found a reason to continue with a year full of colour, a year full of sunshine and showers and a year full of documentation and with each little flower I make, a memory is imbedded and another day is over.

Crojo

So the last few weeks have been about family, chilling out and just staying as stress free as possible.
I have stepped away from my goals, finally got my crojo back and started a secret project. I know I shouldn’t be taking on any more projects but if it works out which I’m not sure it will, in ways I will have ticked off one thing from my goals list, just in a different way.

I picked up my favourite yarn, opened one of my favourite patterns by my all time favourite designer and have spent time creating a piece that I think maybe it hasn’t been done before.
Even though it’s really not looking very special at the moment and I’m in two minds about if it will work, every second of hooking away, has been a pleasure.
Finally yesterday it started to take shape and it could just work.🤔
I’ve only got about 10 rounds to go on this pattern and then I will need to wing it to get to a certain stitch count and if all goes well and I achieve what I’m hoping for, I’ll then incorporate it into one of the most famous patterns to date.
It’s going to be huge, thick, heavy and so very warm and I can’t wait to snuggle up under it, put on Outlander and just take some me time, which really doesn’t happen enough.

For those of you that have watched Outlander, it’s pretty damn good, horrific in parts but well worth a watch and as my bud Brett informs me constantly, it’s full of boobs and sex.
I’ve watched the box set twice already and still feel as I could watch it over and over again. With season three out in September it’s a good time to catch up. Be warned though, there is a very nasty rape scene in it.

Anyway I’m pretty pleased that I’ve managed to have some crafting time and that I’m letting my creativity flow. Even though I create everyday with work, it’s just become the norm and as I am not as involved as much as I was with the overall finished project it’s somehow not the same. So when I’m making a blanket I’m creating my own little masterpiece, my own spin on a beautiful designed, written, tested masterpiece that’s taken months of work to give to us the canvas to create our own.
Hopefully soon I may just have something worth sharing with you, watch this space.
Have an awesome day guys, enjoy the sunshine and let your creativity flow.
See ya 🌹