Dear Marley-Kate

Dear Marly-Kate,

When you raced into this world, I looked into your eyes and you brought a love into my heart that I had never before experienced.
When you spoke your first word, when you walked your first steps, I was your biggest supporter and fan.
With every developmental milestone you reached, I revelled in joy and celebration. You taught me the meaning of love — true, unconditional love.
Now you are growing, what an amazing person you’ve become! You have your own personality, your own thoughts and opinions, and your own sense of humour. You have your own interests, your own talents, and your own way of doing things.
I celebrate your individuality and uniqueness and am so honoured to be part of your life.

May you always know your worth and how incredibly precious you are!

As your mum, it is my privilege to impart some important truths to you.

Be true to yourself always. There is no one else like you, so allow your uniqueness to shine through. You never need to change who you are for someone else. You are magnificent exactly as you are.

Live your own dreams. Figure out what makes you happy and pursue it. Follow a path of your own choosing – not mine, or anyone else’s.
Your fulfilment is what I want, and it will come from following your dreams and living a life that has meaning and purpose for you.

Don’t take life so seriously. Have fun. Laugh at yourself when you make mistakes. Don’t worry about things you cannot control. You get only one life, so enjoy it to the fullest.

Love and accept yourself unconditionally. You will always have yourself even when friends come and go, so make it your best relationship. The way you treat yourself will show others how to treat you, so treat yourself like you would your own best friend. Be kind, respectful, and loving to yourself no matter what.

Don’t be afraid to take risks. Take big, bold risks! You can accomplish great things by taking risks. Living life too cautiously and keeping the status quo will leave you with regrets. Get outside of your comfort zone and watch as that comfort zone expands. The more risks you take, the easier it becomes.

Find your soulmate.
You will meet someone with whom you fall head over heels in love and want to spend the rest of your life. As long as you are loved, respected, and treated well, I will always be happy with your choice.

And, last but certainly not least,

Know that I love you and will always be there for you. No matter what, I’ve got your back. You are my beautiful daughter and always will be. I adore you, and there is nothing you could possibly do to change that. There may be times when we don’t always see eye to eye, but I still love you and always will.

Love you to the moon and back

Mummy x

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To be loved

As I grow up, even though I had a stable father figure around, we lacked the bond and love a father and daughter should have. Instead of hugs, I had the belt.
Instead of love, I had the bible shoved down my throat at every opportunity. 

I never could work out if it was because I wasn’t his blood, or was it just the fact that I reminded my mum of my blood father, and he hated that. Or maybe it was the case of him just not liking me.

A child without love rebels, plays up and tests the boundaries more than the normal loved child.
Any attention is better than none, I guess. 

Now when I look back, I really wasn’t that bad, I played up, sure I did, but what teen doesn’t. I really can’t say I was worse than any other child my age. 

Deep inside there was always that longing to discover who my blood father was so maybe just maybe, I was the one who’s heart was cold, maybe I was the one who stopped the bond from forming. Maybe I was the one that pushed and pushed my step father away. 

Maybe, I was the problem.

Since having my real father in my life, feeling a fathers love for the first time, seeing his eyes alight with pride at the smallest of things even when all I’ve done, is smile.
To that quick look across the room, of reassurance, when he knows I’m struggling.
To those silent shoulder squeezes asking if I’m ok.
To the listening, I mean truly listening and those simple words of comfort.
To the belly laughs, private jokes, dry sense of humours that we share.
To even the silent moments when we are totally at ease. 
To the way he loves me unconditionally, a love only a father and daughter shares. 

To finally feel love like that, is one of the most beautiful and special things life can give you. 

A fathers love. 💗